This blog is going to dive into my recent break up & my outlook on breakups in general.
The reason I’m choosing to blog openly about this is because I made a commitment to myself and all of you to be transparent about life as it is. I made the decision to have a lot of my life be public over social media in hopes to help people feel less alone. I think often times we can fall into the social media trap of believing everyone is living their best life. A perfect & unattainable version of life that can leave people comparing and feeling disappointed with their own lives.
This is why I choose to be transparent about the good, the bad and the ugly. There is no perfect life, no perfect relationship, no perfect job, no perfect family dynamic & owning that has been one of the most freeing experiences for me.
As most of you know I was with my past partner for a year and half. It was a very public relationship. So naturally, I feel it’s only fair to at least let you all know this relationship has come to an end.
We had a unique relationship from start to end. We dated long distance for the first half and after meeting we both took turns living in each other’s countries. The relationship we had and displayed on social media was very true to how it was day to day. It was the healthiest relationship I have been in to date. It helped me grow in more ways than I probably can even fully understand yet. I will not disclose any details out of respect for him and the relationship we both shared. However, what I will say is this. Healthy relationships can end and that’s okay. You can outgrow people you love. There doesn’t need to be constant fighting to know that your paths no longer align. There is wisdom in knowing when you are no longer gaining what you need from the relationship.
Relationships ending are never easy. Emotions tend to come in waves long after the relationship ends. Grief of what could have been sinks in. It can be a roller coaster of emotions to say the least. I will say this, since healing myself, I view relationships ending very differently. I used to view relationships ending as a failure. I viewed some of them as abandonment. I at times damned love all together. I thought I would never find my happily ever after. I do not feel that way anymore. I believe all relationships serve a purpose. I believe we can learn a lot from relationships that come to an end.
Learning to accept what happens in your life even when it’s difficult is the fastest way to move out of the suffering stage and shift into pain. Pain is manageable, where as suffering is not. The acceptance of situations in life is inevitable so I do my best to accept reality immediately so that I can manage my emotions better.
This relationship ending can be sad in the fact that a chapter with someone I cared about deeply is ending. However, this time it is not going to be sad in the fact that I am losing myself. I have healed myself, gained so much self awareness and have grown an immense amount over the past two years. I am happy to be walking away with myself because I am whole on my own. As one individual I offer so much and I know that now. I trust in myself more than I ever have. I know I will be okay and I trust that I will love again one day when I am ready.
I hope this brought some closure to all of you as it did to me. I hope it brings comfort to those that are currently enduring heartbreak. I hope it brings peace to those making the hard decision to end healthy relationships for the sake of their own needs / wants. I hope that you’re reminded that no one’s life is perfect and there is so much empowerment in owning that.
Thank you so much for reading and coming along with me on this journey.